Your Inability to Submit is Nothing to Brag About
“I’m 100% dominant.” “I don’t have a submissive bone in my body.” “I couldn’t be submissive if I tried.” It’s the favorite […]
Category: Essay
Mentor Someone
I’m always hearing that the world of kink doesn’t have enough mentoring, or that we used to have mentors but we’re losing […]
Topping From the Bottom is too A Real Thing
I just read another essay arguing that topping from the bottom doesn’t really exist—that the phrase is just a way that people […]
The One Most Important Thing For Having Smoking Hot Scenes
There are so many things to learn in order to create hot BDSM scenes. There’s technique with ropes or paddles or knives […]
Submissive Skills: The Ceiling and The Floor
We domly types often like to think the way D/s works is that we tell you exactly what to do and you […]
Can “No-Limits” Be Real?
Hi! You’ve been linked to this essay because the kinky forum you came from has been derailed by an argument over whether […]
Inspiring Submission
A little excerpt from my shiny new book, The Heart of Dominance. The first lesson to learn on the path to competent […]
Dominant Technique: Let Them See You Coming
A little excerpt from my shiny new book, The Heart of Dominance. Many of us love to play with surprise, and for […]
The Poisoned Gift
Stop me if you’ve heard this one: “The one with the real power in a D/s relationship is the submissive, because they […]
Collar Inspirations
Last week I wrote about assumptions and manners for behaving well around collars in kinky community. This week I add some ideas […]