Can “No-Limits” Be Real?
Hi! You’ve been linked to this essay because the kinky forum you came from has been derailed by an argument over whether […]
Inspiring Submission
A little excerpt from my shiny new book, The Heart of Dominance. The first lesson to learn on the path to competent […]
Dominant Technique: Let Them See You Coming
A little excerpt from my shiny new book, The Heart of Dominance. Many of us love to play with surprise, and for […]
The Poisoned Gift
Stop me if you’ve heard this one: “The one with the real power in a D/s relationship is the submissive, because they […]
Collar Inspirations
Last week I wrote about assumptions and manners for behaving well around collars in kinky community. This week I add some ideas […]
Collar Manners
There is no more powerful and widely recognized symbol of submission than the collar. Collars are used in all kinds of different […]
The Imperative Mood
We’re having dinner with friends. She says to me, “Those potatoes look delicious. Would you like to pass them to me?” and […]
Dominant Technique: Paraphrasing Fantasies
Really powerful dominance is founded on really deep knowledge of our partners. We can rule them and guide them and play them […]
Negotiation Tip: Get to the Heart of Desire
I have a bone to pick with negotiation checklists. Anyone who’s looked for education or advice on how to negotiate for the […]
Going For the Brass Ring
Whenever she sat down in a staff meeting, the slave liked to imagine that everyone in the room could hear her rings […]